Peter, Do You Love Me?
Peter, Do You Love Me?
I’ve often imagined what it must’ve been like to be Peter in the moments following that rooster’s fateful crow the morning of Jesus’ crucifixion — what he must have felt, what he must have thought, what he must have believed about himself and about Jesus.
I bet Peter felt ashamed of, disappointed in, and frustrated with himself — full of sorrow and regret, and no longer worthy to be called Jesus’ follower, let alone His friend.
And once Peter learned that Jesus had risen from the dead, as much as Peter longed to see Him, I bet he wrestled with how impossible it would be to ever look Jesus in the eyes again.
I bet Peter believed it was over for him. That Jesus would send him away. Certainly, Jesus would not want Peter on his team anymore, nor would He ever again entrust him with any sort of role in His earthly ministry.
And I bet Peter even wondered if Jesus — the Savior of the world — could still possibly be his Savior, after how far he’d fallen.
We don’t have any record in Scripture of what Peter may have asked Jesus in their first conversation following His resurrection. But it wouldn’t surprise me that, even if Peter never voiced the thought aloud, Jesus would’ve anticipated that Peter was wondering that very thing. I cannot think of a question more common to humanity, when we’ve blown it so badly, than this: “Jesus, am I even really Yours?”
One of the reasons I think Peter may have asked Jesus this question, or Jesus may have simply perceived that Peter was wondering as much, is because of the first recorded words we have of Jesus directly to Peter following His resurrection: “Peter, do you love Me?” (John 21:15-19).
Countless times throughout the gospel accounts, we see examples of Jesus answering people’s questions with a question of His own (e.g. Matthew 12:9-11; Mark 4:38-40; Luke 2:48-49; Luke 6:1-4; John 21:20-22).
This was Jesus’ way, and I believe it still is. I think the reason Jesus does this is because He knows the heart of our questions better than we even do ourselves, and so He knows the better questions to ask to get to the heart of the matter. Jesus has always been about getting to the heart of the matter.
So, whether ever uttered by Peter or not, I suspect that Jesus heard Peter’s heart-question: “Jesus, am I really Yours? Jesus, could you really save someone like me?”
It’s the question we all ask at some point. (If you haven’t yet, brace yourself. Your day will come.)
It’s the idea that the devil loves to whisper in our ear at our darkest moments: “You’re not God’s. You’re not really saved. How could you possibly be saved, and still look like this — still feel like this?”
“Jesus, am I really Yours? Jesus, could you really save someone like me?”
And just as I believe Jesus did for Peter that day, Jesus answers our question with a question of His own: “[Your name here], do you love Me?”
Peter would have understood this question better than us, because He would’ve heard it through the lens of Jesus’ words — the words he’d taken in, day and night, for the better part of the last three years. Better yet, through the lens of the words he’d heard directly from the mouth of Jesus the very night of Peter’s great fall: “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments” (John14:15).
What Jesus was asking Peter wasn’t merely, “Do you love Me?” as we understand love. No, what Jesus was asking Peter in that moment was this: “Peter, am I your Lord?”
You see, that is the better question. Because if Jesus is your Lord, then He is your Savior. But can He truly be your Savior without being your Lord? That is the question forever debated — even in our own hearts.
This is why, I believe, so many Christians — real and fake — live without any sense of certainty that they belong to God. Because to whatever degree we knowingly live unsurrendered to God, uncertainty flourishes.
And in that uncertainty, we ask God to give us some sort of affirmation that we belong to Him: “God, am I really Your child?”
We hope that He’ll say yes, but if we truly listen, I believe what we’re more likely to hear is this question: “Am I your Lord?” Because as long as we’re living unsurrendered to God, we will fumble all over answering that question — just like Peter did.
There is little-to-no confirmation, affirmation, or assurance of salvation given for a life not surrendered to God; there are instead ample questions, doubts, and frankly, warranted fears.
Conversely, the very act of surrender, as demonstrated by Jesus in the Jordan River, is met with ringing affirmation: “This is my beloved Son. In Him, I am well pleased” (Matthew 3:13-17).
Peter knew, if true lordship requires surrender, then he wasn’t fully there yet. The last three days had been all the evidence either Peter or Jesus would need to prove that. And so, that was the matter to be addressed.
But Jesus’ question to Peter was not a disqualification; rather, it was an invitation! Notice, every time Jesus asked Peter that question, no matter how Peter responded, Jesus always followed with some variation of, “Take care of My sheep” (John 21:15-17).
And if, after all that, there was still any room left to doubt that this was an invitation, Jesus made it plain to Peter by reiterating the words He’d spoken to him three years prior: “Follow Me” (Matthew 4:19).
Now you’d think at this point, Peter would’ve surrendered immediately, all things considered, right? Unmerited second chance, and all. Wrong! Even after all that, Peter had the audacity to question Jesus’ plans and methods (John 21:20-21), just like so many of us — just like me. And still, ever-patient, Jesus extended His invitation to Peter once more: “You follow Me!” (John 21:22). And this time, Peter accepted.
Peter surrendered to Jesus, His Lord — to His plans and His methods. And if Jesus hadn’t been Peter’s Lord before that day, most assuredly, He was from that day forward. The evidence? All the days of Peter’s life that followed, as he cared for Jesus’ sheep.
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